Ohhh, don't use that word
I
am fascinated by word choice. Over the years I have been married twice. I could
have tried hard to marry a different kind of woman the second time. In the end,
I married a woman. Word choice by a man in a relationship is paramount. They say
elephants never forget. Forget that: a woman never forgets.
A man says what comes to mind. There
are articulate men who seem to always say the right thing. In private, with the
woman close to them, it is a different story. All men say something that
offends a woman. I will admit that at times it’s a trap. Woman love to bury their
men in a word trap. They say things like “do you think I’m fat or pretty.” Even
better they ask us to compare. The man does one of two things. He either opens
his mouth or keeps it closed. Either way your dead by the words you said or
didn’t.
I grew up saying “sticks and stones
will break my bones but words will never hurt me.” Words seem to hurt people
worse. Take the famous “C” word. Funny that I mention the “C” word and people
know what word. A woman can use it and it’s still considered horrible. A man
uses it and its death. I can guarantee that your relationship will never be the
same with a woman if you let that word slip.
Others words fascinate me too. How about
the “N” word. It’s another word that only needs the first letter. An African person
can use that word and it’s fun, mean, playful, and common. A white person says
it and its death. A woman can call someone a bitch but a man commits suicide if
he does. Even words like terrorist and homosexual have become harsh words. Yet
all these lovely words have meaning and describe something. It all depends on
who is using them and why. Even the why is death usually.
What does God have to say about
words? Proverbs 21:23 “Whoever keeps his
mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” Those are smart words
from God. Yet, he is just stating the obvious. I’m not sure why God gave us
such a loving and dangerous thing as the tongue. Ephesians 4:29 “Let no corrupting talk come out of your
mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it
may give grace to those who hear.” A positive word is usually better than a
bad one. I know I’ve been married twice.
Still, positive words have their downfall.
If you always say nice things, then instruction and guidance will be lacking. I
like this verse and it applies to words. 2 Timothy 3:16 says “All Scripture is God-breathed and is
useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness.” Sure,
they are talking about the Bible but it’s words. I could say all words are good
for love and rebuke. I feel the biggest problem in the church today is word
choice. People go out of their way to not offend. That is not biblical. In the
real world, it’s the same thing. We tend to not rebuke others because it’s
deemed offensive. In both instances, bad choices and bad people are allowed to
run amuck.
Of course, there are good words and
bad ones. There are good intentions and bad ones with words. I have meant well
and been burned to a crisp many times by the word I chose. It’s a man thing
mostly. Patience and words work very well. Saying words with passion can go
badly without patience. Sure, there is inspired moments of speech, but they are
special because they are rare. I’m not sure we can tame the tongue. It’s like
holding a tiger by the tail.
These days we have words to describe society. They are
entitlement, spoiled, politically correct, and many others. Some of it is
founded and to others it seems rash. What I have observed is that people are
easily offended these days. There are very few words we can use properly
anymore. Facebook has become quiet and that’s sad. I suppose being offended has
always been there in defending your honor in a duel or gun fight. I think the
problem is inside. We are really frightened children and words scare the hell
out of us. Are you willing to ruin a relationship by the words you use or the
ones that frighten you?
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