Dear Life

Dear Life, why are you so fun, short, crazy, and terrible all at the same time. I just wanted to write you in response to a few things you did. First of all, why did you make my family relationships so complicated. Their family for crying out loud. Shouldn’t you time their deaths better? I am a busy guy with no time to bury someone. I have no time to clean up their affairs and sell their crud. It appears to me that Life, you’re getting the way.

            Secondly, I need a better body. This one seems to keep getting fat. There must be a problem. The joints don’t work as advertised. This operating unit you called a brain is out of tune, forgetful, and judgmental. Basically, it might be a lemon. I do not appetite only being given one unit. Life you need to reorganize your priorities. The body should be first. We need research into better models so I can look like a model.

            I do have another question Life. Why do you give time to people? It seems racist to dole out a little time to some and plenty of time to others. I always seem to run out. Are there bottles we could catch time in? I like the watch idea but it always tells me I’m short on time, late, and before my time. Why build a second hand anyways. Were visual creatures and I am always caught watching time tick down. Does not seem fair. I have better things to do with my time.

            The matter of people concerns me. You gave me certain people in my life. I want different ones. These people are stressed, rude, jealous, and noisy. I would like a new batch that do what I want. Can I control people in this life? Is there a remote I did not receive? Finally, why did you give color and gender to all these models. It has seemed to cause confusion. If you did not notice, some people kill other people. Is this a glitch in the programming you gave us? Please could you rectify this problem.

            Dear sweet life, God has thoughts about you. He said we are like ants and grass. I’m not sure I get that part. Don’t laugh, he said you are like the wind. God also pointed out that you have built us on sand that is not stable. I thought I ordered solid rock as a good foundation. Life it’s been fun sorta. This Jesus dude wants me to rearrange you in order to live with you better. Is this company policy?

            Two final thoughts on you. One is that you need to be a bit longer. I have more to do while I’m here. Could we have a bigger planet to wreck. This one seems too small. Also, could you change the color. Blue is not my style. Red is cool like mars. Oh, by the way, why build other places in space if we can’t get there in a life time. It’s just me but that seems stupid.

Finally, where are you? I have been searching for life for a long time. It appears you are always hiding in tragedy, mayhem, and disasters. Are you a good or bad life? Someone said life is what you make it. did I make you? That seems weird since I live in you. I personally hope you are found in a box of chocolates. At least I would have a reason for getting fat. Life you are funny. Please forward this memo to all the other human units. They might have more questions for you. In the meantime, have a nice life. 

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